Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Goth Warning!

Not long ago, Connie of Hartwood Roses posted this excellent poem on her blog.  It's been one of my favorites for years, but as I've gotten both older and more Goth, I love it even more.  However, I've made a few changes to it, to celebrate my own metamorphosis.


When I am an old woman I shall wear purple and black
With long red hair that isn't permed, and wigs that don't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on absinthe and black velvet dresses
And platform boots, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit on the hoods of fancy cars when I'm tired
And 'sunbathe' in the library and do crosswords in church
And dance with my cane on public streets
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in chiffon and velvet in the rain
And feed cats and pick flowers in cemeteries.  And learn to swear.

I shall wear black t-shirts and corsets
And eat a pound of bacon at one go
Or only chocolates and potato chips for a week
And hoard bat necklaces and black nail polish and Halloween cards.

But now I must go to work every day
And pay the rent on time and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
I must pay my taxes and watch the news.

But I've started to practice a little now,
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple and black.

So, what will YOU do when you are suddenly old? 


  1. I love Connie; I love the original poem; and, OMG! I love this version!

  2. I like your version, Lucretia! What will I do when I get old? I guess I should give that some serious thought, since I believe I have arrived. ;)

    1. You certainly never SOUND old! But if you think you have arrived there, then you should start thinking about this immediately!! ;-)

  3. So imaginative!! (love you right back!)

  4. Ha! I'm already old and I went to a metal concert 2 1/2 weeks ago. I like to wear Gothic and/or metal T-shirts, a bat necklace, studded bracelet, a wide-brimmed hat and use black as my primary color or shade. So there you have it! lol

    1. Most excellent! An extra 25 points on your Goth card! ;-)

      Hope the concert was a good one!

  5. Great poem, In the UK we had a long running TV comedy series called The Last of the Summer Wine, it was about 3 retired men getting up to mischief set in the Yorkshire dales. Nothing to do with Goth, but the thing is we`d say “The older you get, the more you relate to the characters in it!”

    1. Thanks! Sounds like a good show, I will have to see if I can find it online somewhere. :-)

  6. I remember that poem! I also remember writing a speech in year 10 (which I never performed) about how in 10 years I would be all eccentric and THAT sure came true!

    1. Sounds good, maybe you should share it on your blog! :-)