My New Gothic/Shadow Sabbats

One of the difficult things about being a pagan goth, at least for me, is celebrating the Sabbats in the traditional manner.  I have no problem with late summer and fall harvest festivals, like Lammas (aka Lughnassagh),  the Autumn Equinox (Mabon), or Samhain/Hallowe'en, or with deep winter celebrations like the Winter Solstice (Yule).  But somehow, I just cannot get excited about rituals involving standing out in the sun for any period of time, let alone being HAPPY about it!  So Sabbats such as Imbolc/Candlemas, the Spring Equinox (Ostara), Beltane/May Day, and especially the Summer Solstice (Litha) can be a real problem for me.  However, I have found a few "darker" ways to get around this dilemma.

Frankly, a couple of these Sabbats have absolutely NO meaning for me.  Beltane (May Day) was originally a fertility festival, which is fine if you are trying to have children, grow crops or a garden, raise animals, or "birth" something in your life.  And although I've always enjoyed rituals for Lammas, the August festival of "first fruits", again, there isn't any real meaning for that in my life.  So I decided to remove these from my calendar entirely, unless and until I can find some good reason to celebrate them.  However, I added the Mexican Days of the Dead in November ("Dias de los Muertos") because four days of celebrating and honoring the dead just seem SO appropriate, especially right after Samhain!

I have already replaced Imbolc with the Celebration of the Eternal Maidens/Youths I described in my previous post. Here is my projected list of 'new and improved' Sabbats:

February 1 or 2: Imbolc  "Celebration of the Eternal Maidens/Youths"

March/April:  Ostara (Spring Equinox)  "Celebration of Coming Forth by Day"

June:  Litha  "Welcoming the Waning Year"  (the day after the Summer Solstice)

September:  Mabon (Autumn Equinox)  "Into the Darkness"

October 31: Samhain/Hallowe'en  "Final Harvest: Honoring the Dead"
                    (similar to Samhain and Hallowe'en combined)

November 1-3:  "Days of the Dead  (Dias de los Muertos)"

December: Yule  "Winter Solstice: Night of Shadows"

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term "coming forth by day", the generic name of the so-called Egyptian Books of the Dead was "The Book of Going Forth by Day".  They were individual collections of various prayers, formulas, spells and information written for the dead to help them get past all the dangers of the Underworld so they could reach the Hall of Judgment in safety, and then telling them what declarations to make to the gods so they would hopefully be admitted into their version of the Afterlife. Each "book" (which might be written on papyrus scrolls, on the inside of the coffin, or even on the tomb walls) was specifically geared toward the individual who purchased it, so they are all somewhat different.  In creating this particular celebration (which is still a work in progress), I changed the word 'going' to 'coming' because I am building it around the idea of the dead 'coming' to us instead of us 'going' to them.  Well, it makes sense to ME, anyway...

So, what holidays do YOU really celebrate, and how do you celebrate them? 

My "Celebration of the Eternal Maidens/Youths"

For most pagans, February 1 is known as either Imbolc or Candlemas.  It is considered the actual beginning of spring, when the earth begins to awaken after her long winter sleep.  However, for the last few years I have been celebrating my own more goth version, which I call the Celebration of the Eternal Maidens/Youths. 

I began by going to my local grocery store and buying white flowers.  I try to find the less expensive ones that have many blooms on fewer stems; they don't have to be fancy, no need to spend a lot.  I cut the blooms off the long stems, leaving individual flowers with stems only a few inches long, and put them into a small basket.  Then I took them to the local cemetery, to the older section, which has an area dedicated to the graves of children.  I looked for the ones under 16 years old, with no flowers, toys or other signs that people are visiting them.  And on each lonely, untended grave, I placed a small white flower, then read the child's name out loud. 

These are the children who will never grow old, the Eternal Maidens and Eternal Youths.  May they dance forever in the sunshine.

"S/he who can be named is remembered.  S/he who is remembered lives."   

                 

February: "I'm So Goth..."

A tribute to the First Lady of Goth...


 

January 2015: "I'm SO Goth..."

I stole copied this pic from Mary Bart's blog, Mourning Glory Designs, because I just LOVE it, both the cat and what it says...




And if you can, BE the first person to love the person you hide... 

Hello, 2015: My "New Year's New Lifestyle"

Has anyone heard my weird bass noises yet?  I've been practicing for a bit now, and so far no complaints!  Of course, it does help that I'm using headphones so that no one actually HEARS my efforts but me...  ;-)

Anyway, I have been thinking a lot lately about how negative my outlook has become due to all the chaos that happened in 2014 (including the leaking pipes that recently caused my bathroom to be torn up yet AGAIN), and I have decided that this needs to change.  To that end, I am starting myself, not on "New Year's resolutions", which everyone ends up dumping sometime in January anyway, but on a "New Year's New Lifestyle".  (These could very easily morph into my goals for Bat Fit 2015, so stay tuned.)

I begin my New Lifestyle by dividing my life into four sections: Physical, Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual.  I've used this division before, and it works because I'm able to be clearer and more specific about what I want to do.

In my Physical Lifestyle, I am paying more attention to what I eat and how much.  I am using the pedal exerciser my mom got me every day.  I am also choosing to start taking a private tai chi/yoga class with a friend at her home.  Now I will have an "exercise buddy", and we won't have to deal with getting to and from classes in rush-hour traffic.

Mental and emotional aspects of my life often overlap, as I am sure they do with most people.  I have decided that I will put career-related activities and things to do with my personal mental health and well being into my Mental section, while things like creative writing, music, and dance will go into my Emotional section. 

In my Mental Lifestyle, I am still deciding what I want and how I will achieve it.  I guess you could call this section "Under Construction" at the moment.  While I know what my ideal job/career would be, I also need to be realistic about the limited opportunities in this place and at this time.  I need to decide how flexible I am willing to become in order to move forward, and create a viable job/career goal for now.  I am also choosing to be more positive about the job I have right now; this may be easier to do this than I thought, since I found out today that my take-home pay is over $400 more than it was before!  :-)

In my Emotional Lifestyle, I am practicing the bass at least every other night.  I'm not planning on joining a band or becoming a professional, so I don't need to push myself if there are times when that would be more harmful than helpful.  However, practicing any kind of discipline causes you to live totally in the moment while you are doing it, which is good for your emotional health.  I am also working on a very simple needlepoint project I inherited years ago; the main design is completely done, and all that remains is filling in the blank canvas that surrounds it in a plain off-white yarn.  I have done many needlepoint projects over the years, but I'm finding this one extremely soothing, simply because it's just empty space.  I need quiet, empty space in my life right now, and this is a perfect focus for it.

In my Spiritual Lifestyle, I am doing two different book studies/practices with like-minded people. The first is with The Shamanic Witch by Gail Wood.  This book combines elements of witchcraft and shamanism into a unique practice.  I've read it before, and found it very enlightening.  The second study is with Walking the Twilight Path: A Gothic Book of the Dead by Michelle Belanger.  This is also a unique practice about discovering the beauty and mystery of death, and incorporating elements into one's daily life.  I am working on combining the two practices into my own unique path.

May 2015 be a splendid, wonderful and totally gothic year for ALL of us!!  So mote it be...

                             

Goodbye, 2014

I am SOOOO glad this year is over!  It's been, quite literally, the worst year of my life... and I hope it STAYS that way.  I don't need another year as awful as this one has been.

Goodbye, 2014... may you take all the bad, sad crap with you, and never return!!!

  

In Memorium: Chango, 2004-2014

Chango was born on September 19, 2004, while my coven was having a Mabon ritual at my house.  We knew his mother was pregnant, as we'd been feeding her and her two older kittens for quite a while.  Our first glimpse of him on the day he was born (we have a picture in our main computer, which is on the fritz right now) was of an orange and white ball of fur surrounded by four black balls of fur (his sisters). 

Because they were in danger from a construction crew who didn't know they were there, Martin brought them all inside when they were three weeks old, along with their mother.  We eventually found homes for two of them, but Mama and the other three stayed with us, and we took in the two older kittens as well.

Even when they were still nursing, Chango always had to be in the middle of things.  He had soulful golden eyes that made you melt looking into them.  He was spoiled rotten, and got into the habit of whining when he wanted something.  He loved to cuddle and be carried like a baby, but kneading was his life.  As a human, he would have made one hell of a bread baker!  He was constantly rushing between my feet to get into my altar room so he could sprawl on the floor and hang out with me there.  He brought love and laughter into our lives, along with some frustration and a few tears.

A couple of years ago, he barely survived an infection that started in one fang and spread to his lower jaw.  I told him then that he couldn't die before we paid off the $845 bill.  I don't think he made it, but it wasn't for lack of trying. 

Last month, we found that his liver had failed, and he had a less than 33% chance of the medication helping him.  Fortunately, it did, and we were given six extra weeks with him.  However, a few days ago, he began going downhill again, and this time the vet found a mass in his abdomen.  He told us frankly that, even if he managed to successfully remove it AND even if it wasn't cancerous, having two serious medical situations so close together meant that Chango's chances of surviving another year were low.  Because of this, combined with his age and the prohibitive costs, we decided to let him go.  We didn't want him to have to go through all this misery a third time.  So the vet gave him a tranquilizer before the final shot, and we held him and rocked him until he fell asleep.

Losing a beloved fur companion is never easy; it's even harder when you are with them from almost their first breath to their last.  Then they're more like your children.  On Monday we will take him to where our other children in fur are buried.

Bast and Sekhmet, please guard your brother Chango, and guide him safely to wherever our beloved cats go! 

We love you, Chango!  Rest in peace, Mango Boy.